An international dating and tour service is not like your average dating service. Aside from the simple process of browsing profiles and matching characterizing preferences, international dating sites such as A Foreign Affair (www.LoveMe.com) provide translation for multiple formats of communication, multiple monthly tours to gorgeous countries in Asia, Latin America, and Russia, and socials where single men can meet hundreds of beautiful single women.
Many men jump into international dating feet-first without doing the appropriate research. By exploring the available content online, you will be able to fully understand what is involved in international dating, besides the fun stuff. Even the Singles, however, requires a bit of knowledge.
Like anything else you invest your time and money into, you will want to perform your best when international dating. In order to do that, you should know the basics about what to do and what you should never do. Here, from the minds behind A Foreign Affair (www.LoveMe.com), the leading international introduction and tour service on the planet, is an outline of the most common DOs and DON'Ts of international dating.
Getting Started
DO: Do the research. The first step in the international dating process is usually exploring and joining a website. If you plan to get involved in international dating, be sure to explore and research your options thoroughly. Many companies and websites partake in fraudulent behavior and can cause major problems in your life. A high quality, legitimate website will have basic contact information in very easy-to-find locations, often on every page. You should always ignore a site that avoids posting its phone number, pricing, and address clearly. Transparency is key to a strong company, so avoid services that are unclear about their prices and contact information.
DO: Plan a tour. It's quite important to plan where you are interested in visiting. When a woman sees that you are planning on visiting her area on a specific date in the future, she will be more inclined to speak with you. She will feel more confident that you will actually come to visit and have an opportunity to meet up in person. Many men get too involved in letter writing and never commit themselves enough to travel overseas. If you decide where you plan to visit and have that posted on your profile, you will probably receive more responses.
DO: Decide on critical factors. When you are exploring the available profiles, constantly keep your critical factors in mind. Before joining a site, think long and hard about the critical factors you will search for. For example, have your mind made up about your feelings on marriage, children, employment, and other major parts of your life. Even if that twenty-two year old looks like a model, she might not want kids. If you do want kids, there is really no reason to communicate with her in the first place. This leads to another important point: honesty. When corresponding with women online, you may feel the urge to lie a bit about yourself. Although men think this will increase their chances of meeting someone they love, it actually hurts them. If you lie about yourself, you will attract women who you are not compatible with; that's a fact. You will be presenting yourself as a different kind of person and will therefore attract women who are not actually interested in you. This goes for anything you communicate about. From your feelings about love and relationships to your opinions about movies and music, you should always give honest answers to questions and respond naturally. Also, best honest about your physical appearance. Send "true to life" photographs and explain how you really look; if your communication eventually leads to a meeting, she will find out the truth eventually.
DON'T: Do not join an international dating service without researching it first. One of the most common mistakes men make is jumping into a dating service before knowing what it actually entails. Unfortunately, many international dating sites partake in fraudulent behavior and could harm you emotionally and financially. No matter what type of scams they are involved in, companies involved in dating scams will only bring you trouble. Before joining a site, also look for red flags that may suggest fraudulent activity. An example of a red flag would include the company keeping their phone number and office address off of their website.
DON'T: Do not reject an interesting woman because she does not speak English. Besides the fact that reputable international introduction services such as A Foreign Affair (www.LoveMe.com) offer translation services in both textual and auditory formats, you and the person you're interested in have the ability to learn new languages yourselves. If you meet someone perfect and get to know them through a translation service, don't hesitate to start learning her language. If you make an attempt to learn hers and she attempts to learn yours, you will have no problem communicating in the future. Learning a new language expands your horizons, makes you more accessible, and also makes you more intelligent. With so many different personalities in the world, it would be a shame to pass up your perfect fit because of a language barrier.
DON'T: Do not have unrealistic expectations. When you join an introduction service, you will not necessarily meet the love of your life in the first week. If you discover someone interesting right off the bat, that's great, but don't limit your search there. Take advantage of all the options and profiles your service offers you and meet tons of different people before settling down. The beauty of online dating is that you can explore without making any commitments.
Communicating
DO: Remember that communication is key. If you do not communicate, you will never truly get to know somebody. Although we suggest keeping your options open to meet many different women on an international introduction tour, you should definitely get to know someone in a destination country where you plan to travel. By communicating consistently (without overdoing it!), your personalities and preferences will arise and interact. This way, you will get a feeling about whether or not there is chemistry between the two of you. You should attempt to communicate over the phone with someone if you have been messaging back and forth for a while. Getting to know their voice and the way they talk is important in understanding their manner and personality. Keep your options open and continue to browse around even if you meet someone you like. Expand and narrow your search, as you further understand what you like and dislike about the women you are meeting. The more you focus your search with honesty, the quicker you will find a compatible match for love.
DO: When communicating with the women, provide realistic expectations of them Don't expect to approach this process any differently than you would a normal date or romantic situation. These women are just as interested in meeting someone great as you are. Instead of coming up with unrealistic expectations of the women you meet, be sure to differentiate between those that are realistic and those that are unrealistic. Determine your most important factors and be sure to search for those; for the other expectations that might not be as important, keep them in the back of your mind but don't end a good relationship because of them.
DO: Give her time. Giving the women a lot of time to get to know you will enhance your chances of developing a strong relationship. Instead of pressuring a woman to like you, let her get to know you at her own pace. You can come off as desperate or even rude when pushing yourself into someone's life. If you really like someone, try and get to know them without seeming too desperate for their attention. If you take your time, you will seem confident but open to communication.
DO: Enjoy yourself. Having fun and exploring all of your options is a major part of international dating's beauty. While taking time to seriously find a partner for your life, you will also be able to have quite a bit of fun. Exploring an online dating service is exciting because you never know when you will scroll across the love of your life. The options will feel endless as you browse through thousands of people you have the ability to communicate with. The most important component to the whole process is having fun. If you aren't enjoying yourself as you browse and communicate, you might come off as a negative person when writing letters or talking over the phone. Don't forget that dating should be an enjoyable experience that makes you want to return.
DON'T: Do not write obsessively to anyone. No matter who they are or what they find interest in, they will be turned off by someone sending them five letters every day. If you think you are at risk of overdoing it, try and gauge your own actions by observing hers. If she waits a day or two to reply to your letter, wait a day or two to reply to hers. You essentially want to avoid scaring them away. Sending letters obsessively not only seems creepy to many women, but women will also see this as a sign of weakness or desperation. If you are interested in somebody, give it time! If she is truly the love of your life, she will not just disappear.
DON'T: Do not immediately dismiss a woman simply due to a difference in age. Even though a woman is older or younger than you does not mean she is not meant for you. Because people mature at different ages and grow with different experiences, a twenty-three year old woman might be perfect for a thirty-eight year old man. It all depends on the individual people within the situation. If you find yourself connecting with a beautiful young woman and your mind tells you it's inappropriate or not functional, ignore it! Any two people can be meant for each other; age should not be a factor in love unless it is over a thirty or forty year gap.
DON'T: Do not, for any reason, offer to send money to a woman you meet on a dating service. Until you have met and known them for a decent period of time, you have no reason to trust them. Because online dating provides such an easy way for people to create new identities, you may not know whom you are actually talking to. It could be some guy telling you what you want to hear in order to make you send money over for a "plane ticket" or a "Visa." Even if you really are talking to a beautiful woman, there is no reason you should trust her with your money. Again, DO NOT SEND OR GIVE AWAY YOUR MONEY FOR ANY REASON! This can seem like great way to make a girl like you, but it only brings a ton of risk into the equation and will make her like you for the wrong reasons anyway.
Traveling and Visiting
DO: Meet as many women as possible. If you plan to travel to another country on an introduction tour, be sure to keep your eyes and mind open. When you have the opportunity to meet hundreds of beautiful, intelligent women in one place, take it! Meeting tons of women and exploring your options will be the best way to find the love of your life. Some men choose to go on tours just to meet one woman, but that doesn't make sense because it will be a huge waste of time and money if they don't click. Meet as many women as you can on these tours, no matter what happens online.
DO: Be selfish. When you invest your time and money into enjoying an international introduction tour, you are investing those assets in order to gain love and happiness. Does it make sense to limit yourself? Absolutely not! You have the right to be selfish, and by that we mean be in tune with your desires and willingness to act upon them. If you see a woman you think is cute, go and talk to her! Don't feel obligated to hang around and keep anybody company; this is one of the greatest opportunities of your life to meet intelligent, beautiful women who are interested in meeting you. Ignore your social restraints and just get out there! You have nothing to lose, and chances are you will meet someone kind, attractive, and also ready to start a long-lasting relationship. Being selfish will help you find your best fit possible.
DO: Look for a common ground when you meet someone new. In order to spark a conversation, discover something you have in common and try and get her to open up about it. The common ground could be anything from your views on marriage to your favorite musician. No matter what it is, you will be able to more comfortably converse with the person about a subject you know a lot about. This will also work for her, making her feel more comfortable with the subject matter. Through a common interest, you can get to better know each other's mannerisms, opinions and personalities.
DO: Have confidence in your surroundings. Just because you are visiting another country doesn't mean you have to sit back and let your date make all of the decisions. Do a little research beforehand, or talk to your travel service, and find some cool places to go on a date. When you get together, let her know what the plans are. This way, you can emit confidence in every way possible.
DO: Keep an eye out for the little things. For example, one of the most important aspects of communication within a date is body language. If you notice your date playing with her hair, subtly touching your arm or leg, and leaning in towards you, you can be pretty confident that she is interested in you. If she is very reserved in her movements, staying back in her chair, keeping her arms crossed, and not smiling, she is probably not very interested. Reading body language will not tell you definitively if she likes you are not, but it can definitely lead you in one direction or another. Remember that your own body language will affect things as well. Make sure you show interest with more than just your words by using your own form of body language.
DO: Have fun! Although we've already mentioned this, it's worth touching upon again. Many men find themselves nervous and overwhelmed when entering this situation, but remember that it's just another opportunity. You have nothing to lose, and the women who attend are just as interested in meeting you as you are in meeting them. Instead of thinking too much, try to relax and just enjoy the social environment. Whether you are meeting one woman for a date or a bunch of women at a social, staying relaxed will help you to just be yourself. Listen carefully, ask questions, and feel free to express your true feelings. Think less about finding love and more about meeting new, interesting people. If you can just be yourself, you will present yourself accurately and will have a better chance of finding a compatible life-long partner.
DON'T: Do not ignore your gut feelings. On an international introduction tour, you will be introduced to hundreds of women who are looking for a relationship with an American guy like you. As you meet them, you will find characteristics about each that you will either like or dislike, but that doesn't mean they aren't right for you. If you meet someone and have a gut feeling that the chemistry works, don't just walk away because of some small detail you don't like. Just because a woman does not follow a certain career path or have certain interests does not mean she isn't the love of your life. On the contrary, having different interests will allow you and your partner to expand each other's horizons over time. In other words, a gut feeling can be more than just a feeling sometimes. If you find yourself drawn to someone, explore the possibilities! You will have nothing to lose.
DON'T: Do not let your date control the meeting arrangements. Because you are the one in the foreign country, you are the one at risk. If you end up in a situation where your date brings along a bunch of friends or meets you in a place where she is more comfortable than you, there is a risk that you may end up alone and unsure of your surroundings. If you take control and designate locations for your date, you will be comfortable knowing your location and where things will be going. As a citizen in her home country, your date should be more than happy to enjoy the locations you've chosen. She will also be impressed that you have the confidence to make those decisions in an unfamiliar place.
DON'T: Avoid performing an "interview" when you meet a new woman. Even though you are enjoying the trip in order to meet women, you should not live through the mindset that they are there to please you and fill your requirements. Although it's important to learn her views on critical factors like marriage, you don't need to force that information out of them. Instead of drilling them with questions, focus on getting involved in a comfortable conversation. You should attempt to court the woman, not push them for answers. Don't forget that you are attempting to spark interest; just because you know that all of these women are single and available doesn't mean you will be successful by simply performing interview after interview. Show the woman you are interested in her personality and allow the conversation to flow naturally. Only time will tell if you are a match.
DON'T: Do not communicate through their translator. Language interpretation can be a huge part of the international dating experience, but knowing how to use it properly is half the battle. When utilizing a translator, you should always use an interpreter that you have chosen yourself. This way you will always know that the translations are word-for-word. This will also guarantee that the translator will act professionally, continuing with you until your date is over. If your date is friends with the interpreter, it can lead to an unfortunate and possibly lonely situation for you. Also try to use multiple interpreters throughout your meetings.
DON'T: Do not avoid one woman or another because of one certain detail. If you find a woman attractive and interesting, who cares if she is twenty years younger than you? If you are happy and she is happy, nothing else really matters. If there is a language barrier, study a new language course! Choosing a partner will affect your life more than any other decision you will make. Don't limit your options with fixable problems.
DON'T: Do not take her on a shopping date. If you do, it will imply something about the relationship that you both probably want to avoid. You will be hurting yourself by either insulting a woman you are interested in or attracting a woman who is only interested in your money. If you avoid shopping dates you will spend your time together talking and getting to know one-another's personalities. By showering her with empty gifts, she will get an incorrect perception of your personality and will expect that kind of treatment in the future. This kind of situation is bad for everyone involved as the relationship will probably end over time.
DON'T: Avoid the "rescue" mentality when participating in a social. When you see a woman sitting all by herself but you aren't really attracted to her, do not feel obligated to go and talk. Remember to be "selfish" and only approach women who you think will be compatible with your personalities. You will have the opportunity to meet hundreds of women, so why limit your choices by approaching someone who won't be compatible?
DON'T: Do not judge. Simply observe. In order to get to know these women, you must take time to listen to them. Instead of immediately walking away once you find out something you don't like, take the time to understand where they are coming from. Observe the type of person she is and don't push her to be who you want her to be. One of the best parts about dating is meeting people who are different than you. A lot of people limit their search to people who are just like them, but this is a major mistake. To grow and learn throughout life, we must explore other people's perspectives and opinions. With this in mind, focus on learning about who these women are and you will be able to better decipher who is truly compatible with you.
Conclusion
As you can see, the international introduction process includes a lot to consider. To participate successfully requires a lot of research and even more patience. Some people get lucky and meet someone right away, but most take their time until they discover someone just right. Either way, international dating brings happiness and comfort to thousands of people around the world each year.
Although dangers do exist, there are also simple precautions you can take to avoid them. By educating yourself, you will more clearly understand the problems that can arise within this process and be able to avoid them confidently. By taking the time to understand the undertaking, you are increasing your chances of finding true love through international dating. Visit www.LoveMe.com for extended information on each of the subjects we have discussed here.
If you follow these basic "DOs and DON'Ts" of international dating, you too can fall in love with an intelligent, beautiful foreign woman. By filling your head with knowledge and patience, you will be one step closer to love.